Finding My Mom Rhythm

Liam is almost six months old and its been just recently that I feel like I've finally found my rhythm as a mom. I read a book a few months ago called "Mom Connection" by Tracey Bianchi. This book was given to me as a gift and focuses on cultivating relationships with other moms as well as developing a unique rhythm for your family.

I like to compare motherhood to swimming. I used to love swimming. In fact, at one point I was swimming a mile a day while in college. I love the way my body feels when swimming. My arms and legs move together in a pattern that propels me through the water while my head, mouth, and lungs develop their own rhythm that allows me to breathe at just the right time. The rhythm of swimming stretches and strains my muscles in ways that make me rejoice in the wonder of God and how he has uniquely designed the human body for exercise. Granted, swimming requires you to exert effort that sometimes feels impossible. There are times when I'm swimming that I'm not sure if my lungs will hold out for the next opportunity to breathe or if my muscles will continue to propel me to the other side of the pool in spite of some cramping. However, I always leave the pool feeling accomplished and looking forward to my next swim.

Motherhood is so much like swimming. If you don't develop a rhythm, you are just flailing around in the water, doing your best to keep from drowning. This is exactly how I felt up until a month or so ago. It seemed impossible to imagine the day when life would include routine again. I looked at other moms who seemed to have found their rhythm and sighed at their accomplishment of what seemed to me an impossible task. I wished that I could be like them instead of dreading what tomorrow would possibly bring. I felt like my life as a mom was just so unpredictable and that the end of every day saw me treading water - not going anywhere, just trying to stay above water.

After we moved to Fort Collins at the beginning of January I realized that I had no excuses for not developing my mom rhythm. I was done with school, we were done with packing (for awhile anyway), and Jace now had a consistent schedule at work. There was no reason for me to continue treading water. I needed to put my face in the water and start swimming.

I decided to develop a loose schedule of when Liam would nap, eat, and bathe. Jace and I also decided to move Liam's bedtime up by an hour and to wake up before him in the mornings instead of just waiting for him to wake us up. Liam started sleeping through the night about a week after we moved. He sleeps in his own room every night and usually sleeps a solid 10 1/2 hours. He still hasn't quite gotten the hang of regular naps and still takes three of four naps a day that are anywhere from 30 minutes to an hour and a half long. Liam also isn't exactly regular at when he eats but I let go of that strict schedule a looong time ago! I let him tell me when he's hungry and when he's full. He's been doing really well with solids. Liam eats solids once a day and has tried rice cereal, bananas, apples, pears, mango, and today he tried butternut squash. So far his favorite is mango!

I feel so much better now that Liam and I have developed a rhythm. I'm not scared of waking up in the morning because I have no idea what the day will hold. Granted, every day brings something new and unexpected. Just like swimming when your lungs start to burn or a muscle is cramping, there are days in motherhood that seem impossibly hard and painful. These are days when you question your ability to keep swimming. However, I've learned that those days can be part of my mom rhythm as well. Most importantly though, and what I'd like to tell other first time moms, is that every mom should develop a unique rhythm that best suits her and her family. When I decided that it was impossible for me to be like other moms because one, I'm unique and two, my baby and family are unique, I was able to accept Liam's natural rhythm and appreciate the individual that he is.

Liam is a gift from God and I should know by now that God's gifts are unique to the recipient. He doesn't give all his children identical gifts. How boring would that be?! I am constantly reminded that Liam is exactly who God wants him to be and that my job as his mom is not to make him like anybody else. My job is to teach Liam to love God. The best way to do that is to love Liam and match my rhythm to swim with him.

"I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." - Psalm 139:14 NIV